Thursday, June 23, 2005
myy compliicatedd liife :)

hahas.. realised i din update 4 like so damn long.. -_-" n im in year2 alr.. -bEaMs.. hahas.. been tied up w so mani projects lately.. cant breathe anymore.. hahas.. but dere is ntg i can do.. soon, d sem will b over.. tym passes so fast wen ur in poly.. hahas.. soon, we'll b outta sch.. b4 we even noe it.. o wells.. but m enjoyin poly life.. o ya.. mid sem test is comin soon.. gotta study liaos.. tym 4 d muggin period alr.. den is term brk.. den start sch.. not long, its gonna b holidays again.. m in sch now.. hahas.. having sociology classes.. using my lappie.. muahaha.. (= hahas.. n im sick.. tsk.. tt sounds reali bad lo. have been coughin n coughin non stop in class.. i dun like tt feeling.. i hate tt feeling.. sigh.. alrite.. update again later.. i've got stuff 2 do..

laters..

5:01 PM
brokenn luuvv*

Saturday, April 02, 2005
myy compliicatedd liife :)

its over. we're over. feelin sad, disappointed, wantin 2 die, cry, wad else? cant express anymore. nid sum tym alone fer now.

11:56 PM
brokenn luuvv*

Thursday, March 31, 2005
myy compliicatedd liife :)

at tym, i wish we wun quarrel so much. cos i missed her so much. so damn much. i missed her gd bye kisses n msgs. miz her like nuts. but we have 2 end a converstaion w a quarrel. which makes me wanna cry. stuck at a situation. of whether shld i call her or not. sigh. msg her. but im afraid tt she din on her hp. shall gif it a try now. d loneliness is killin me. knowin tt she's mad at me. juz wanna let u noe, i miz u baby.

10:25 PM
brokenn luuvv*

juz got off d fone w her. had a tiff w her. sigh. wish i din start it. haiz. dunno wada do rite now. shld i call her back or not. wish 2. but she have off her hp. wish 2 call her hse, but im afraid tt she wun b hapi. sum tym, i dunno wad shld i do. kinda stuck. so wish 2 tok 2 her. i miz her so damn much. but dere's ntg i can do. wish 2 tell her tt i luv her n i miz her. but i cant. eventually, she'll juz hang up d fone on me. most of d tym at least. stuck. is d word i'll use. she dun like me 2 cry. so i wun. did so much fer her. wish she noe it all. but, guess she wun noe aft all.
aft all lovin sum1 is wantin d best 4 tt particular person. aint it? sigh. luv is such a complicated ting. once u step in2 it, it'll b diff 2 step outta it. once u luv sum1, sum how or rather, u'll luv dis sum1. onli dis 1. nobody can try 2 tk ur heart away from tt sum1. cos u'll given ur heart 2 her. no matter hard they try, u'll always luv tt sum1 whom u've given ur heart 2. no matter wad she does, no matter how much tt sum1 tries 2 hurt u, u'll always tell urself tt it doest matter. cos u luv tt sum1. n i've found my tt sum1 in my life. her name's eleanor. feels wierd 2 call her by tt. no matter wad she does 2 me, she'll always b special 2 me, special in my heart. n i'll onli luv her. no matter wad she does. cos, i've given my heart 2 tt special sum1, nn her name's eleanor.

10:18 PM
brokenn luuvv*

juz changed my skin. heh.. gg out soon. away from dis hse. mom is 4eva nsggin at me.. well, haven been bloggin 4 a long tym alr. hahas.. long long tym. lifes as boring, as usual. havin my holidaes now. b-o-r-i-n-g h-o-l-i-d-a-e-s. gotta stay at hm. cant reali go out either. wakaka. tokin bout holidaes. wad stupid holidaes i've got. w my mom naggin at me.. o yeah. im sick. ha. aint it even beta? wells, tired. hahas.. have been slpin so much lately. slp from 10plus to next mornin 11 plus or 12 plus. m i turnin in2 a pig or wad? -shrugs. wad m i writin again. hahas. crappin as usual. but glad d exams r over. lidat ii wun feel so stress oso le mah. heh.. goin out soon. dunwan c my mom n hear her naggings. its drivin me crazy. nida get away b4 i explode.. *h e l p* ha ha ha. shall blog more ltr. gg outta mit her now.. -bEaMs =D tk care 4 now.. (=

12:23 PM
brokenn luuvv*

Wednesday, February 23, 2005
myy compliicatedd liife :)

haven been bloggin fer sum time.. mani tings happened thou.. scary.. sigh.. projects r pilin up.. dere is so much 2 do in so lil time.. faintin soon.. bloggin fer awhile den i gotta go do d ob project.. tml got formal presentation.. tiring.. muz wear till so formal.. like wad.. ... b.o.r.i.n.g dun feel like goin 2 sch tml. sigh. everything's fallin apart.. im bored 2 tears.. juz taken my acc test ytd.. hope i did well..

Joy, thx yea. fer studyin w me tgt.. yups.. (= we shall study more next time tgt.. like more motivated when we study tgt.. thx fer being dere fer me when im down.. yups..

well, back 2 e story.. lets c, i still have got jap project 2 do, econs not even started yet.. -faints.. hahas.. feelin pretty slacky lately.. dun feel like doin anything.. tired i guess.. sigh..

Candice.. cheer up.. dun b sad le.. hugx.. it aint d worth.. concentrate in ur studies now.. hugx.. smile.. put tt smile on ur face n let d troubles fade away.. alrite? (= i dun wanna cya sad..

Rachel.. Cheer up too.. dun sad oso.. now study hard 1st.. hugx.. alrite? hees.. i noe u nid time.. but dun tk too much.. tink bout it k.. hugx.. n dun b too stress on d projects...

i miz u baby.. haiz.. pls dun b mad at me.. i din do it on purpose.. haiz.. im sori..

alrite.. tink i gotta go back 2 my projects n studies liaos.. i luv u baby.

tk care 4 now ppl...

9:04 PM
brokenn luuvv*

Saturday, January 29, 2005
myy compliicatedd liife :)

i miss u baby.
i nid u in my life.

10:43 PM
brokenn luuvv*

Friday, January 28, 2005
myy compliicatedd liife :)

i miss u baby.

11:58 AM
brokenn luuvv*

tings been pretty bad lately.tings juz aint goin my wae.im fallin back in2 depression real fast.im confused at wad im gonna do next.but at least d term test r over.dun nid 2 wori so much.yups.o.cny is comin!got loads of spring cleaning 2 do. -faints. but im not given a choice.muz help my mom w d spring cleaning.yups.yime passes real fast.way too fast liaos.now is alr 2005.thou everything tt happened last yr is still vivid in my mind.went back 2 sch 2 do project.did quite alot.now left econs onli haven started.yups, as u can c me n krystal is quite slack.way too slack actually.but its ok.cos tts wad make us similar so we sorta click well.krystal, call me if u c tis.thanks joy,4 being dere 4 me when im so down.cheerin me up n tried 2 side track my tinkin.yups.big thank u 2 all hu was dere 4 me.sori ta make u all worried.hmm.o ya,almost 4got.still got jap project.argh -screams. so mani 2 do, so lil time.im gonna faint soon liaos.lets c.a list of tings tt i gotta do, spring cleaning, projects (jap, econs, mbs?? ob??), wad else?dun realli rmb liaos.

tings wun b d same w/o u n u noe it.but u made tis choice urself. i wun blame u, cos im at fault myself too. dere's ntg ican do anymore. when i saw ur msg "sori, im attached le" , i cant help but start cryin. but does it help? i sorta doubt so anymore. cryin doesnt even solve anything. u noe i juz quarrelled w my mom. but instead of understand, u juz took everything into ur own hands n do tings as u pls n as u wish. sumtimes u make me wonder, m i even considered ur gf? it hurts 2 tink bout such stuff n 2 make tings worst, d ans i get is a negative ans. wadz d pt? cant realli comprehen. neither m i gonna tink so much. sorta brings me into a deeper depression. will u eva understand how i feel? wad im feelin? i understand ur feelings n tried 2 b understandin. but i guess i prolly failed in tis aspect. not being able 2 tolerate. thanks 4 teachin me how 2 LOVE n LAUGH. but bringin me back 2 square 1 again. im wae too naive i suppose. tinkin t by givin ur all in a rs, its gonna help. but NO. tis is life, tis is reality. it wun help. cant help but tink at time. luv doesnt realli seem 2 exist in d reality world, but onli in d illusional world. in tv drama? movies? prolly. feelin ntg but hurt, hurt n hurt. can do anythin but cry, cry n cry. guess i juz gotta learn 2 stand up once again n b strong. thanks 4 makin me stronger den b4. i gotta make my life rite. learn 2 treat tis all as a bad dream n 4get bout it. im sori thou 4 everything tt has happen. wis h u happiness w ur new gf. gdbye.

i s h a l l l u v n o m o r e.

11:34 AM
brokenn luuvv*

Monday, January 24, 2005
myy compliicatedd liife :)

tings aint d same w/o u.

8:09 PM
brokenn luuvv*

sigh.mani tings happened lately.juz finished my test 2dae.so far so gd.tink im gonna fail accountin.its onli by luck if i pass.hahas.bus stats was great.ob norm.d rest so so onli.cny is comin.so gotta start d 'spring cleaning' tingy.gotta help mom.hopely by thu can finish.den fri go on shoppin spree. -beams =D but yea.goin out w mom is fun.hahas.cos i get almost everyting i wan.well,almost.not all thou.hahas.or my mom's gonna go broke.wahaha.ok.not v funni thou.so mani tings happen lately.brk patch brk patch brk patch.sumtimes she makes me wonder wad exactly she wans.its quite confusing.juz wish.but its onli a wish.wishes nv come true.its juz wad we wan.

i wish we'll nv quarrel again.

well.its not gonna happen.she wans me NO MORE.i shld juz get it in2 my brain.im glad d test r over.now i'll have more time 2 tink.n it wun affect my studies tt much le.sigh.im sinkin in2 depression.so fast.too fast.im revertin back 2 my old ways.but i dun wish 2.m i such a lousy gf?

u brought me out.out from my depression too.do u even noe tt?u changed me.in2 sum1 much beta den hu i was in d past.so much beta.u taught me 2 learn 2 control my attitude.u taught me how 2 luv when all i knew was HATE.u taught me how 2 laugh again.u taught me 2 b nice.u taught me so mani tings tt changed me 4 d beta.but now, ur bringin me back 2 square 1.bringin me back 2 my depression daes.it was all back den.

tears.
its juz all tt i noe rite now.but wadz d pt of cryin when i noe u'll turn back no more?
hurt.
its hurts so much 2 noe tt i actually mean so lil 2 u.ignorin me n stuff.it has nv occured 2 me b4.nv.not once tt actually all tiz time, i mean ntg 2 u.
heartbroken.
yups.my heart's been broken.been broken by u.yes u.
promises.
promises r meant 2 b broken aint dey?all d promises tt u made 2 me.
trust.
where's d trust gone 2?
luv.
n where have all our luv gone 2?aint we supposed 2 last 4eva?was it juz a dream?an illusion tt i've been havin all along?was it juz my imagination?
hate.
i dun hate no1.i juz hate myself.

im exhausted.so tired.from everything tt's happening rite now.tings r moving too fast.way too fast.i cant catch up w it.i wanna slp.a long n deep slp.pretend tt ntg has happen when i wake up.d hurt is juz too much 2 bear.too much.

alrite.i shall shut up.

anw, happi chinese new yr 2 all. n gd luck 2 every1 4 their mid sem test..

LEster>>
hahas..ya.but haven pierce yet.long story.so how have u been?long time nv hear from u.hahas..tk care k.. (=

UnyandaO>>
erm.hu r u btw?hahas.but yea, thx. (= tk care too..

7:26 PM
brokenn luuvv*